Do not wake me up. I just hypnotized myself.

Guess what?

I know. You will never guess, unless you read my other article about hypnosis. I will give you the link at the end of this article. Anyway, In that article I was trying to hypnotized people. I know I fail because I forget one little detail: I did not know how to do it.

But that is in the past. Now This is different because this is a different me. More powerful, better prepared.

Let me tell you what happens. I bought an hypnotism course. Not anyone. A professional one. Let me tell you something about me. I have not time to go to a class room. So I really enjoy to learn something at my pace and most of the times, my pace is kind of faster than a regular classroom.

So back to my question: Guess what?

you see? I already put ideas in your mind. This is amazing.

Now I will tell you what I learn in the first class: I am not going to dominate the world. So relax now because hypnotism cannot make you do things that goes against your moral values. Hypnotism is not going to make you do things that you are going to regret as insult your mother-in-law, because that is impossible. Unless that old lady deserve to be insult and you really want to do it.

I have to tell you the truth: everything I know about hypnosis I learned from Hollywood. Also watching movies I became expert in Life in Mars, children education, life in China and sex.

Finding the truth about sex was the most dramatic experience for me because I cannot understand that my girlfriends got angry because I had a plastic doll in my closet. For a long time I was thinking that I only get attracted to girls with issues. (whatever that means).

Anyway I am a married guy now and I denied the 'doll incident' every time the subject surface. Even I say to my friend that I created that rumor myself because I find it funny. And that bring me back to my knowledge about hypnosis. I was in shock went I start my Hypnosis course, not because I want to conquer the world, forget about that, but because I did not know the real power of our minds.

So now I am hypnotizing myself. That's right. My first victim is me. Not that I complaining, because I sleep better and as a secondary result, I need less time to sleep. I found that you do not need 8 hours to sleep. It happens that you only need to relax, but that is going to be a little bit difficult if you to sleep with so many people and their problem in the same bed. So the trick to a better and profound sleep is sleep alone.

I have to explain myself. you do not have to divorce to have a better sleep, I do not think divorced people sleep better, maybe they do, but that is not the point. What I mean is that you have to learn to sleep and hypnosis is a good way to do it. But is a little difficult when you go to bed with your neighbor in mind, scared because Bush could be re-elected for another 4 years, with the boyfriend of your teenager daughter in your mind and even with your wife's complaining. you will never relax. Hypnosis is the solution? It always is, because your mind get to relax, only when it is able to send all those people in a room and forget about them. Yes, Even your wife has to disappear for you to relax properly.

I hope my wife is not reading this.

Anyway... Did I tell you about the container box in the parking lot?, Imagine yourself in a parking lot. It is empty. Do you know what is the container box for?

To put everybody and... Relax.
Three, two, one... Sleep

This is the link for the other article about hypnosis. Hypnotism and the PMS
If you really want to relax soon, visit my colorful page at at http://germanmunoz.googlepages.com/hypnotismyourself

Watch for people that steal you money in the airport. (especial report on security)c

The good part when you take a vacation, is not the vacation itself, but the preparation. Those days when you decide, when to go, where to go and how much is going to be.

I always underestimate the cost. Unusually when I am back, I am broke because I did not calculate that I have to rent a camel if I want to see the pyramids. And you are going to be surprise by the prices. Well, prices vary. They fluctuate according to one and only one factor: Your face.

Those camel rentals in the sands of Egypt detect who is a tourist from two miles of distance. They make a quick calculation base on the following formula: Multiply how profusely you sweat by how big is your camera, divided by the color of your pants and add the result to the number of your children. Add a little manipulation in the forms of scary characters, one nun and a camel, and that gives you the price to pay for your camel' rent. . I will assure you that it is cheaper to buy the camel than to rent it for three hours.

Another factor I always miscalculated is the airport. Is common knowledge that thieves love airports because everybody have money in their pockets. So the following report, is a true and painful story that happen to me last summer.

It was July. 6:00 in the morning. I was the first in line to buy a ticket to Athens. how come I was the first in line? Because I spend the night waiting to buy a ticket. At any price.

Big mistake, because British Airways was ready to sell me a ticket at the greater price possible. The camel rentals of Egypt look innocent and candid compare with this lady that smiling all the time took my $1,399 for a ticket to Athens. One way. And something else. I was the first customer. She did not have change, so I gave her a $1 dollar tip. As a gesture of friendship, that lady mark my passport as "suspect" so I was double and triple check at the security post.

Yes, Thieves uses uniform too.

How much is the fair fare of that trip? I would say around $200 to $300 dollars. So I overpaid and in the process I have to fight an unfair match.

But, Revenge is sweet.

well, not really. I have done nothing in revenge. But I want to go to Europe again. So this time I am prepare and again I will be the first in line but this time I am prepare. Matter of fact, is going to be another unfair match but this time in my favor.

Because now, I know how to buy an airline ticket for the lowest price. And when I mean lowest, I mean that I am going to have enough money to buy a camel when I arrive to Cairo. I will never pay $1,400 for an one way ticket. How am I going to do that? Preparation and knowledge. And remember something, British Airways declare the war and I just refuse to be another victim.

Visit me in my Website for more information.

Gasoline is expenseive. That is a good thing.

A gallon of milk is more expensive than a gallon of Gasoline. I wonder why, since I am sure the cows are right here in my garden. Sort of. Gasoline in the other hand, is imported from another continent. So I am not going to be happy until Milk gets cheaper than gasoline.

Maybe I am asking for a problem, since one of the possibles solutions, is that oil companies raise their price a little more.

I used to go out to get milk when milk was needed, but my wife rarely sends me to get it now since I tend to spend more that I am supposed to. If I go out to get a gallon of milk, I end up spending about $50.00, because I cannot resist a good offer of 3 Pounds of cheese for $9.99. Add the yogurt with Latino flavor and extra bread and before you know it, I am deep in trouble.

I am not a member of spenders anonymous because I know for sure they would elect me honorific president.

The only way to save money is in gasoline. I am not the kind of savvy husband that reads coupons, or tries to compare different stores. I always go to the closest supermarket and do all my shopping in five minutes or less. Also, I never forget to get something for my dog, a toy for the cat and a sudoku magazine. Sometimes I forget the milk but nobody is perfect.

So, maybe I am not saving money on gasoline if I have to go twice for a gallon of milk.

So I discover the perfect way to save money in gasoline if I have to go two or three times to my closest supermarket: Run my car by water.

Sound a little too extreme, but for desperate problems, desperate solutions. Let me tell you how it works.

Put your safety goggles on please. As you know (and you should know) Water is not anything other thing that of a mix of Hydrogen and Oxygen. Remember H2O?

Anyway, and before this gets boring, All I did was, extract the hydrogen from the water and use it to power my car. So now I have no problem with the price of gasoline. I am saving money and doing it while Reducing Emissions and Preventing Global Warming. Al Gore should ask for my autograph. Not that I am looking for a better price for a cup of milk, but I feel better when Arrive with my five paper bags. (I do not use plastic bags anymore), I know I let a few details out of my explanation, but who cares of what is going on in the water when the point here is that you are saving the planet? Not to mention that you are saving money too. A lot of money.

The only thing I wonder now, is if we can put this water system in a Nascar car. I should contact one of those teams to reveal my plan.

Anyway, if you require more information, let me know so you can start saving the planet from your house. As they say: Think globally, Act locally.

If you require more and real information, please come to my website.

Hypnotism and the PMS

I am going to make you sleep. Do not close your eyes yet.

You are going to feel sleepy. At some point I am going to count from ten to one and that's it, you will feel at peace with yourself.

I know what you are thinking. Hypnosis. Another one that try to impress us. I have to let you know that I am not an hypnotist. I would like to be one but... hmmmm let me try.

...on you.

OK, keep reading only my words. forget about everything else. Do not think even for a moment about all the money that Bill Gates is doing right at this moment. Concentrate on you.

I am going to write from ten to one. and you are going to feel sleepy. It is going to be a weird feeling because you are going to fall sleep without closing your eyes.

Ten Nine Eight your arms are heavy, they are going to fall on your legs. Seven

You are falling on trance.

Eight Seven Six Five

falling and falling

Seven Six Five Four

Imagine yourself in a building, going down, steps, steps, down.

Four Three Two One

Sleep...

At this point you are sleeping, with your eyes open and very relax.

It is another of the new things that internet gave to the new world. nobody will be able to write a letter in paper. nothing comes to mind when you have a pen in your hand. A keyboard? That is different. We can fill blogs and blogs with all the news of the planet including how many babies Britney spears will have when she reach retirement age. Not including adopted or foster children.

Keep your eyes open and sleeping. At some point you hand is going to feel heavy and you have to rise it. Do not fight it. Let it be. (Copyright The Beatles)

Internet also gave us ciber-girlfriends. The first thing that you note in a ciber-girlfriend is that can tell when somebody is PMSing. I guess that is the word. A girl in the other side of the planet can laugh more often, be more understanding and fun, but as soon as the PMS attack, they block you, do not respond email and if she does it, is to insult you for every little mistake that you have o have not done.

Keep sleeping. your hand feels heavy now. react accordingly.

The fun part start when the PMS disappear and she is once again the funny girl of the block. Is my girlfriend a mental case?

Of course. But we need at least two years to touch reality and by then, it will be too late.

Now I am going to count from three and you are going to wake up. You are not going to remember much. the only thing from this session is that next time you detect a PMS attacking your girlfriend, you are going to fell happy.

If you are a lady, then next time that PMS arrives, you are going feel an inexplicable need to hug your man.

three, two, one. Wake up.

How you feel?

Just in case that you feel the need to know how I got hypnosis abilities, please go to see my Secret Files.